Particle Theory

by Westy Reflector

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1.
She had to leave Ohio Find a strength she’d never known She had to shed her skin What she was was too far away from what she was within You pay the price / To be yourself When you’re not the one / The world expected But we are each a universe Where every drifting moon / Deserves a spinning Earth Everything you are, we are, too. She followed her dreams to New York A thousand feet in the air she found love He said “You should never feel alone. You had the light in you all along. “Do not live life as a shadow… I know… “You pay the price / To be yourself When you’re not the one / The world expected “But you and I make a universe Where every drifting moon / Finds a spinning Earth Everything you are, I am, too.” In the clouds and in his arms She let go of right and wrong Tore away her shirt; threw away her tie Turned her shadow into a sword You pay the price / To be yourself When you’re not the one / The world expected But you and I make a universe Where every drifting moon / Finds a spinning earth Everything you are Is a universe Where every drifting moon / Finds a spinning Earth Everything you are, we are, too.
2.
3.
05:06
She spent 27 years in an inland town And she dared herself to rage every time she stopped looking down And then the ad in the paper said “Dreams come true! “Just get downtown and see you know who… “If you know how to rage, then we want you!” She bought an audition dress at Main Floor in the Redlands mall And she nearly died when the salesgirl said “You know, that dress, it kinda makes you look…tall.” And then she got up this morning and waited in the queue, Then they said, “Sit here until we call for you. “There’s dreamers in front, who queued up, too, to be…” All the rage and out tonight. All that rage in black and white In the public eye and out of sight To be all the rage. Someone said, “Never mind her, just get yourself downtown.” When her sister said “Give it up, baby, it’ll never work out.” So now she’s in a folding chair against a fake fake wall as the sun goes down outside a windowless hall, and she can’t lose her shit ’cause her name’s been called… She blew them away in that downtown room And now we see her everywhere like a Sun God… And her hometown paper gave her the whole home page Now she gets a table where she used to dance a cage And she’s never alone, now that she’s All the rage. And out tonight. All that rage in black and white In the public eye and out of sight She’s all the rage…
4.
04:24
So there you have it, we wrote our ticket out We’re headed anywhere we want to choose We never really planned it, just never had doubts We were going somewhere – never gonna lose Yeah, the stakes are high But our vision’s clear And neither of us is pure, but our moment’s here It’s ok to embrace uncertainty A quiet life we may never see But for now this noise makes a symphony In the middle of chaos, you’re my melody So here I’m landing, took the red eye out I see the causeway that leads to you St Mary, guide me down from the clouds Harmony, carry me through So there you have it, we wrote our ticket out We’re headed anywhere we want to choose It’s ok to embrace uncertainty A quiet life we may never see But for now all this noise makes a symphony ...let this noise make a symphony In the middle of chaos, you’re my melody
5.
3. “I could’ve saved him.” (x4) 14. You wouldn’t know he was an Oscar winner. 10. When asked if he had ever sold Hoffman drugs 5. He said “If I was with him, it wouldn’t have happened.” 7. He said he had known the 46-year-old “Capote” star for about a year. 3. “I could’ve saved him.” (x4) 8. Hoffman injected 18. He claims he last saw Hoffman — high — in October. 11. “When we got together, we talked about books. 4. “If I knew he was in town, I would’ve said, ‘Hey, let’s make an AA meeting.’ 3. “I could’ve saved him.” (x4) 6. “Not under my guard.” 17. The star’s final, four-month struggle against drugs. 12. And art. 9. 73 bags of heroin found in a Greenwich Village apartment. 15. He loved his kids. (x4) 3. “I could’ve saved him.” (x4) 13. “He was a normal guy. 2. “He was my friend. 16. “I offer my condolences to his family. 1. “I didn’t kill him — and I could’ve saved him.” 3. “I could’ve saved him,” jazz musician and admitted junkie Robert Vineberg said, wearing a gray prison jumpsuit and hunching pensively at a red table in a Rikers Island jail visiting area.
6.
she didn’t feel suspicious - or paranoid she didn’t see the distance - into the void she learned to play with all the memories - like toys she said it made it easier to drown the noise she worked for years - to create confusion as she waited for life to reveal itself as an illusion along the way she learned not to search for conclusions as we drove the roads around my house she wasn’t gonna stop until she broke down all those angry hours she said, “don’t tell me when to turn around... “i’ll tell you when we turn around “just keep driving to the moon “don’t you dare turn around 6am underneath the subway tracks she said if that train was a plane I’d jump right on its back then she rolled her eyes and taught me how to fade to black as we drove the roads around my house she wasn’t gonna stop until she broke down all those angry hours she said, “don’t tell me when to turn around... “i’ll tell you when we turn around “just keep driving to the moon “don’t you dare turn around
7.
8.
9.
In front of the firing line You’ll look up at the blue sky And we’ll trace the route to each other’s eyes In the wake that’s left behind As the sounds of the gun shots die You’ll leave this world with your head held high Don’t look for justice at the side of the road Don’t trust the crowd We are on our own You will live in the memory of birds The wind will carry your words Your dreams will serve as my alibi Truth is a lonely place Lonely as a human race Don’t look for justice at the side of the road Don’t trust the crowd We are on our own In the wake that’s left behind As the sounds of the war drums die We leave this world with our heads held high
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11.
you & i let's float away lighter than air lighter than light you can't break down what you can't divide you can't destroy what you can't collide let's float away you & i let's drift away we are the clouds that make a perfect sky you can't break down what you can't divide you can't destroy what you can't collide let's float away
12.

about

Reflections on justice, rights, escape and love.

Life imprints sentience on the particles we cede back to the universe upon passing. Death is decentralization, not expiration, of consciousness. Each of our atoms comprises the cumulative wisdom of all that has experienced life before. We are each one, and we are each all.

For John.

credits

released November 14, 2014

Written, performed, programmed and produced by Westy Reflector
except
Truth Is A Lonely Place (Lee Rosevere remix): mixed and produced by Lee Rosevere | happypuppyrecords.ca / leerosevere.bandcamp.com

Cover shot: "Stargazer Moonrise" (2012), Outer Banks, NC

Thx:
Catherine Marie Thomas, Sterling, Jim Obergefell, John Arthur, Marc Weidenbaum, Josh Azzarella, Bassel Khartabil, Antoine de Saint-Exupery, Kurt Vonnegut, Wren Arthur, Laura Brown, Richard Shepard, Paul Schwartz (Peekamoose Guitars), Sean McCabe, Sandra O'Connell, the Disquiet Junto

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The Reflectors New York, New York

rock.pop.
ambient.beyond

"a cloud fitted with an iron scaffold…
in stereophonic splendor."
- disquiet

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